


Hunger of the Heart

by phinnium



Category: Ironman, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spiderman - Fandom
Genre: Gen, Irondad, Irondad angst, Near Death, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker Whump, Spiderson angst, Starvation, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, hunger, just a forewarning, spiderson, yeah pete nearly dies, yeah this is sad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-29
Updated: 2019-07-06
Packaged: 2020-03-29 10:29:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19018078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phinnium/pseuds/phinnium
Summary: An alternate ending to Infinity War, in which Peter Parker survives the snap. Arguably, the outcome is worse.





	1. Returning

**Author's Note:**

> Just bear in mind, this gets pretty damn dark.  
> Also there's a little bit of foul language.

A deep rumbling tore its way across the entire compound, as the ship slowly touched down against grass. Tony could hear the creaking of the ships' main door as it opened, though he paid no mind to it. He could only focus on the unmoving form of Peter, lain across the cold metal floor in front of him, his body seemingly wasting away. The older of the two watched intently as the child's chest rose and fell, taking a deep breath himself every time it fell, half expecting it to not rise again.  
The young spider had practically become just skin and bones, his muscle and body fat having withered away due to lack of sustenance, and it was taking it's toll. Of course, the lack of food had affected him far more than it had Tony, the fault lying in the hands of his enhanced metabolism. By the tenth day, Peter was in pain. By the fifteenth, practically agony. Between that day to the twenty first, he had spend the days just sitting on the floor, having the strength to do nothing else. Even when it came to eating what little food they had, Tony had to hand feed the poor boy.  
On the evening of the twenty first day, Peter had lost consciousness, and hadn't woken since. During that full period, Tony hadn't left his side. Himself and their new blue companion had shifted him into a somewhat comfortable position, the older mans' jacket acting as a pillow under his head.  
Nebula pitied the pair, Tony could tell. Though she wasn't much for sharing emotion, he knew those glances. He had received them in abundance throughout his life. And usually, Tony would hate it. He would despise it with all of his heart. But right now, Tony didn't care. If anything, he pitied himself. He was well aware that the woman needed much less food and oxygen to survive, and so, once he and Peter had dropped dead, she would simply be left, floating in space with two corpses for god knows how long, with no help in sight, until she eventually joined her two shipmates. So, in a way, everyone present deserved to be pitied at this moment in time. 

That was until a massive glow began to appear in the distance. At first, Tony thought it might be the light arriving to finally take him. But as it got closer, it started to take shape. The shape of a person.  
And now, that person was touching down their ship on solid ground, back on Earth.  
Maybe they weren't going to die here after all.

Muffled voices began to echo their way around the ship, finding their way into Tony's ears. Pepper. He could hear Pepper. Her voice was shrill, panicked. Tony lifted his gaze away from the half dead boy in front of him, to find Nebula gone, probably to gain the assistance of whoever it was entering the ship. Pepper was alive. She hadn't been... disappeared? Dusted? It didn't matter. She was alive, and that was all that mattered.  
As voices got closer, footsteps began to accompany them. Tony lifted his arm, and pushed it against the wall behind him, using whatever strength he could find in order to stand. After attempting this maneuver a few times, he let himself fall back onto the ground with a resounding thud.  
He stayed there. He only moved in order to find Peter's hand, and intertwine their fingers. Staring at the child's pale face, he shuffled forward slightly, and gently cupped his cheek.  
"I'm sorry," he whispered, "I'm so sorry, Pete."  
"Tony?"  
He whipped his head around at his name being spoken, partially in surprise, and partially in the hope that whoever it was could help him get his kid off of this damn ship.

Steve Rogers. Steve fucking Rogers. In that moment, Tony couldn't be happier. The familiarity of the man's face almost made Tony forget entirely about the situation at hand.  
"Steve," Tony's voice cracked, "help him. Please help him."  
He had never seen the soldier move faster, as he laid eyes on the frail form that Tony clung to, he practically sprung the rest of the way up the ladder, and falling to his knees on the other side of the teen. On instinct, Steve immediately went for the boy's wrist, to try and find a pulse, as the movement in his chest was barely visible anymore. Once his fingertips were met with the weak, slow, thumping, he began to slip his hands under the smaller body, one under his back, and one under his knees.  
He looked to Tony momentarily, "He's gonna be okay, Tony."  
Tony swallowed, before nodding to the Captain. A hand placed itself on his shoulder, nearly making him jump sky high. He turned to face the body it was attached to, as Steve sped off, back down the ladder, dying teen in hand. 

Rhodey crouched beside the mechanic, hand still perched on his shoulder.  
"Hey, Tones"  
He tried to make his smile believable. But he did not reply. He didn't reply as he was lifed off of the ground. He didn't reply as he was assisted down the ladder. He didn't reply as he was supported out of the ship. He only spoke as Pepper darted towards him, wrapping her arms tight around his waist.  
"O-oh my god. I thought I'd lost you."  
"I'm sorry."  
"Don't apologise," she whispered, her head on his shoulder, "it's gonna be okay, he's gonna be okay."  
Tony assumed that Steve had already sprinted as quickly as possible to the med bay, Peter in arms, and Banner not far behind. At least he hoped that was what happened. Judging by the absence of said people, that told him he was likely correct.  
Pepper pulled away for a moment, "we need to get you inside too, okay?"  
He didn't protest.


	2. Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhodey attempts to console Tony.

"It's not your fault, you know."   
Tony lofted his gaze at the voice. Rhodey continued to step across the room, before placing himself in the chair beside the mechanic. Tony had been sat at Peter's beside for hours, his eyes never leaving his still form. The vast array of wires attached to his skin, and the blanket atop his body made him look smaller than Tony had ever seen him before. Rhodey almost had to do a double take. He hadn't spent all that much time around Peter, but he had come across him a few times. However, in each and every one of those times, Peter was one of the most energetic and kind people Rhodey had ever met. Not to mention that he had much more muscle on him.  
Rhodey spoke up again, "I can tell that's what's goin' through your head. That this is all your fault."  
"If you're about to tell me it's not my fault, then I'm gonna have to stop you there," Tony spoke up for the first time in hours, his voice cracking slightly, "I gave him that goddamn suit-"  
"And, no. You are not going down that road. You and I both know that that kid would be dead by now if it wasn't for that suit. Or for you. He comes close to getting stabbed, shot, and concussed every day. And sometimes he actually does. And he always comes to you. You have stood by that kid since the moment you met 'im. That kid adores you, Tony. And that's not gonna change."  
"And look at him now," Tony shifted his body to face the Colonel, "look at him, Rhodes."  
He spoke matter a factly, in a low tone that almost scared Rhodey.  
"He came to me. Hell, he was with me the entire time. He trusted me to get us out of there. And I couldn't do shit. I couldn't save him. I couldn't even save myself. If Rapunzel out there hadn't of shown up when she did, we'd both be dead. Still floating in space light years away."  
Tony turned away once more, back to his original position besides the teen. Rhodey was rendered silent, continuing to stare as his friend slipped his own calloused hand into the bony, unmoving palm of the boy, squeezing it slightly as he simply sat, waiting for the moment in which he would awaken.  
Rhodey sighed, defeated.   
He went to stand, but paused as Tony began to speak again.  
"He was in so much pain, Rhodey. For the first few days, he would insist he was fine, that he could deal with it. It was only on day ten when the kid finally admitted that maybe he wasn't doin' so good," Rhodey could hear as Tony's voice got thicker, "he was stick thin by day 15. Until that point, he had still insisted on helping around the ship, fixing things that were going haywire, trying to extend the amount of time we had left. But when I woke up on that day, I woke up before him, for once. And fucking hell, I nearly had a heart attack right then and there when I saw him. For a couple seconds, I thought he was dead. The only thing I had to tell me that he was alive, was the fact that I could still see him breathing."  
Tony stopped, seemingly taking a moment to collect either himself or his thoughts. Possibly both. Rhodey placed a comforting hand atop the others thigh, giving it a light squeeze. Taking a shaking breath, Tony continued, "When he did wake up, I helped him sit up as best I could, put my jacket across his shoulders, and leant him against a wall. He didn't say a thing, which is what scared me the most. Usually by that point, Pete would be chattering a mile a minute about anything and everything," he chuckled sadly, before his face went grave once more, "but there was none a' that. Just the tiredness in his eyes. And when it came to actually eating, I found out that the could barely lift his hand to his face. I had to hand feed him. God, he hated it. I could see it in his eyes. But he wasn't upset cause he was like that in front of me. He was frustrated at himself. After feeding him that first time, I just spent a little while holding him while he cried. He was scared, terrified. He knew he was on the edge of- of death," Rhodey saw as he scrunched his eyes and nose, the way he did when he became angry or frustrated at his work,  
"For those last few days, we went through that routine, of just sitting, and then feeding him any of the food and water we could. One of the days -day 18, I think? Yeah, day 18. I tried giving him a little bit of my rations, and I have never seen a person look so offended in my life. He practically shoved the food back at me, and spoke for the first time in days. He said 'you need food too.' I didn't want to fight against the kid when he already looked so defeated anyway. Now I wish I had forced it down his throat," he huffed.  
"Day 21- yeah, that wasn't fun. I woke up, before him again. And I waited for a little while, expecting him up at the same time as usual, cause, you know, internal clock and all," looking to the floor, Tony's grip on Peter's hand visibly tightened, "but he never did. He never woke up.  
"I have never been that goddamn scared in my entire life. Not in Afghanistan, not in New York. Not even when I was turned into a human Kebab by that massive fucking scrotum-chinned bastard.  
"Most of that day went by as a blur, but I don't know if that was the shock of the situation, or the lack of hydration. One or the other. And now we're here. With the Invincible Iron Man now significantly less invincible, and the friendly-neighbourhood Spiderman in a coma."   
Rhodey looked to Tony, half expecting him to say more. He removed his hand from the others thigh, and briefly considered speaking, but decided against it. He left the room without a word, and a look of pity on his face that he knew Tony was all too familiar with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We got a bit of exposition lads.  
> I have no idea when the next chapter will be uploaded.


	3. Realisation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter wakes to a rather distressing reality.

When Peter woke, he wasn't sure where he was. He quickly made an attempt to sit up, only to be forced back into his original position as gravity fought against his weak muscles. He flitted his eyes across the room, trying to work out where he was. Had he been captured? Where was Mr Stark? And the blue lady? And why was he so damn comfortable?  
The lights were only bright enough for him to see shapes, but he could feel a weight rested upon his leg, still and mostly unmoving, except for the slow, unconscious breathing. He was on his back, in what must the most softest material in the universe, at least in comparison to the hard metal floor he had become reasonably accustomed to.   
Racking his memory for answers, he realised that he had none for the sudden change of location. The last he remembered, he was laying against Mr Stark, floating in the depths of space, his stomach growling and body losing function. He couldn't be on the ship anymore, as judging by both the quilt he was beneath, and the fact that he wasn't dead, his mentor must've found some sort of help. So where was he?  
A distant beeping slowly made it's way into his head, it's pace fast and somewhat wavering. He shuffled slightly, willing it to stop as his buried into his brain, stabbing at the side of his head persistently. A groan slipped from his lips, barely being registered by his own ears over the sound of the godforsaken beeping. Shuffling at the sound, the weight atop his thigh disappeared, giving Peter much more room to move, as if it would make the sound go away. He hadn't realised when he had closed his eyes, but when he opened them, it was as if the dim lights had suddenly been dialed up to eleven, attacking his eyes, filling them with water.  
Distinct voices entered his head now, joining the beeping. He knew one of them belonged to Mr Stark, but he wasn't sure who the second belonged to. Until suddenly all sound ceased. The light disappeared, darkness taking its place once more. Tony and the other person were still present however, he was sure of that. Slowly but surely, the aching in his skull dulled, allowing him to open his eyes again. The shapes from before were in the same places as they were only a minute before, except for Mr Stark and the other person. Making out a shape to his left, he presumed it was likely Mr Stark, as he doubted a complete stranger would be sat in a chair at his bedside, sleeping against his leg. Said stranger was stood on his right, checking what looked like monitors that Peter presumed were attached to him. Squinting his eyes, he tried to make out the specific features of his mentor's face, but he gave up after a few moments, deciding it wasn't worth it. He came up with a better idea.  
"Mr Stark?"  
Peter hadn't expected his voice to sound so quiet when it left his lips. He was barely speaking above a whisper. He wasn't even sure Tony had heard him. Before he could try again, a reply reached his ears, "How ya' doin', kiddo?"   
Tony didn't sound much better than him. His voice was thick, and crackling, as if he hadn't slept in days. Peter considered his answer for a few moments. How was he doing? He certainly didn't feel good. He could feel how weak his body was, his skin tight, and mouth dry. It felt unfamiliar. But for the moment, he was comfortable.  
"Not great," he hesitated for a moment, "where are we, Mr Stark?"  
"We're back home, bud. On Earth. Right now you're in the Compound infirmary."  
Thank god. He moved on to his next question, "who is that?" He gestured towards the stranger to his right.  
"That is Dr Bruce Banner."  
It was an understatement to say that he was taken aback.  
"It good to meet you, Peter. And to see that you're doing better."  
Peter partially didn't believe what he was hearing, though he didn't get a chance to speak again before Tony spoke again, "FRI, be a dear and turn the lights up to 20 percent."  
As the colour came back into the room, it was confirmed for the boy that stood next to him was indeed, the Bruce Banner.   
"I've been helping to monitor you over the past little while, as you recover."  
Peter attempted to ignore the identity of who he was talking to as he replied, "wait, 'recover'? Recover from what? How long have I been out?"  
Turning back to face Tony, he was met with an expression he wasn't quite able to read. A mix of sadness, anger, happiness, guilt, Peter wasn't sure.  
"You've- you've been out for while, Pete, about 12 days," he paused," We didn't have much food in space, and your body couldn't cope, what with your metabolism and all."  
"So- so I nearly starved to death?"  
Tony held himself back for a moment, taking in a breath. "Yeah, bud."  
Peter contemplated this for a short while, attempting to add everything up. Between the Guardians and Dr Strange vanishing back on Titan, and then-  
Peter shot back into reality. "Where's May?"  
There was that look again. But this time, the sadness was clearer.   
"Tony, where is May?"  
"Pete, we- we couldn't- we didn't-" he paused, "we searched everywhere. There was no trace of her."  
His fist clenched, "so that's it then? She's gone? What about everyone else? Ned? MJ? Hell, the rest of the Avengers?"  
"The only Avengers that survived were the original six, as well as Colonel Rhodes, Rocket, and Okoye."  
"And my friends?"   
Tony gave no reply, he only shook his head.

This wasn't how Tony wanted this to play out, Peter could see that. But Peter was a smart kid, and his mentor knew that, so it wasn't completely out of the blue for this conversation to go something like this. Spiderman had been awake for about ten minutes, and so far, he's had a sensory overload, met one of his idols, and found out that practically everyone who loves him is dead. 

"Can someone help me sit up, please?"  
Banner jumped slightly at the voice, having been so invested in the monitors, "of course, Peter." The doctor bent down, and there was a quiet click, before the top end of the bed was changing its angle, the world around the boy becoming more visible. Peter could see Stark from a more upright angle now, his face much clearer. Well, he wasn't wrong when he said Tony sounded tired. The bags under his eyes made his years much more visible now, his hair a mess and body also fairly thin, though still better off than Peter. He looked old. Worn out. It wasn't surprising that he had managed to fall asleep at the spider's bedside. If anything, Peter was slightly surprised that Tony himself wasn't in a bed too. However, he was in a wheelchair, so he supposed that meant something, along with the IV still latched to his arm.   
Sat in front of the boy, was the last person that he mattered to. 

When his parents had died, he didn't understand. All he knew was that they had gone somewhere tha t he couldn't, and that they were never coming back. Sure, he had been sad, but he wasn't old enough to understand, so why would he have cried?   
When Ben died, the situation was different. Not only was he older, but he had to watch it play out. He was right by his uncle's side, failing to stop the blood pouring from his chest as he let out his last breath. He cried then. But that didn't mean he understood. He didn't understand why someone would want to take anyone's life, let alone a stranger's. He didn't understand why life was so unfair, to have taken away his parents, and now his uncle. When he became Spiderman, he did it to protect them. To stop what happened to him from happening to others. But what no one else knows was that it was also so he could avoid having to listen to May cry herself to sleep every night.   
But now, she was dead too. So were Ned, and MJ. And he still didn't understand. All anyone had ever told him was that life wasn't fair. Sometimes things like this happen. But no one ever told him why.  
"I'll leave you to it, then," Dr Banner spoke up after a few minutes, interrupting Peter's thoughts. It could've been that Banner had been talking to him or Tony for a short while now, and he just hadn't noticed. He nodded politely at Peter before walking out of the door, and leaving him alone with his mentor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These chapters are all quite short, but I've never really been good at writing really long pieces, but I'm hoping you guys can enjoy it anyway.  
> I was asked a couple questions in the comments of my last chapter, but I'm not gonna answer them at the moment, cause my answers might make the effect of some moments a little less effective, but I appreciate the questions anyway!  
> Thank you so much for reading and I really hope you guys are enjoying it! Feel free to leave comments or constructive criticism!


End file.
